Esmerelda And The Vampire

In the interest of alternating between serious deep issues and their polar opposites (well, I AM bipolar, after all) I'm posting this bit that I found while cleaning up the other day. I can't remember when I wrote this, but it was some years back...it's not a song, and not a poem really either. A bit of doggerel perhaps, but appropriate for the upcoming Halloween season. Vampires have been done to death, but they hadn't been when I put this down, so there, hah.

ESMERELDA AND THE VAMPIRE

Her full name was Esmerelda La Conchita De La Crown

And she was the most beautiful girl in parts ‘round here, hands down

When she walked by the boys and men and everyone would stare

And it was generally agreed, “She’s fairest of the fair”

Her lover’s name was Sandor, no last name was ever known

And Esmerelda loved him as a poet loves a poem

No one ever doubted that they were the perfect pair

When people saw their flashing eyes and long black wavy hair

The trouble all began when Sandor just dropped out of sight

And Esmerelda cried for him from dusk until the light

Until one night she heard a tapping at her windowpane

She looked outside and saw at last...Sandor What’s-His-Name.

“Dear Sandor, I can see that you’ve become a Vampire now”

“Well, actually, I have, but Baby, how did you guess, how?”

“You’re tapping on my window in the middle of the night...

And, well, I have no balcony, and I live up three flights.”

“My dearest Esmerelda, come and fly away with me

I’ll give your neck a nip and then a Vampire you shall be!”

“Well actually, my Sandor, that does sound pretty nice,

But then we’d have to kill folks, and we’d both be cold as ice.”

“But Honey, if you leave me then my Vampire heart will break

You might as well just finish the job, and through it drive a stake!”

“Oh, Sandor, you will always be my sweetheart Vampire man

But don’t despair, my clever brain has hatched a clever plan!”

Now San and Esmerelda run a Blood Bank in St. Clair

And if a pint goes missing no one either knows or cares

They come home to a heated casket big enough for two

And since they’re Vampires now, they’re probably happier than you

 

Once More Into The Breach, Dear Friends, Once More

So, after over a years layoff, I return to write in my blog...wandering into the place, dusting off the cobwebs, scaring off random rodents, and opening the windows to let the Autumn light filter in. It's as hard starting again as it is resuming an exercise routine (which I'm also starting to do). The joints are creaky, it kind of hurts to bend this way or that, I get tired way too easily, and I'm dismayed at the shape I've gotten into! But the only way to go is forward really. We are creatures bound in the traces of linear time, after all.

The reasons for giving up writing were pretty normal...I had a hellish few years, is all. Finding my friend Tom dead in his house was very bad, and still haunts me. But after that, the roller coaster seemed to pick up and Cyn and I were swept up in the craziness. My Mom breaking her back, and her subsequent surgery and recovery, then my Dad breaking his NECK, and his very traumatic time in the hospital and later at home, that was tough. But the sudden emergence of my Mom's hidden heart condition, the desperate three months in the hospital, and her death were what smashed me to earth. I'm still trying to cope with that, and to spend time with my Dad, who's even more devastated than I am. As I said, a pretty hellish time. So for a while, writing and sharing my thoughts online just wasn't on, except for short notes on Facebook and such, which was as much as I could manage.

But now, as I have a minute to draw back and think, I realize that perhaps getting some of this out on this virtual paper may not only be good for me, but perhaps might strike a chord in some of you folks who are going through your own losses and traumas, and maybe even do a little good. Some things that we must go through are universal, we're all on the bus together...even though for most of us, the route it's taking is sometimes puzzling. And if you'd like to discuss any of the issues I write about please feel free...it could help us all, maybe. There have been great, wonderful moments interspersed with the pain, and I want to look at how it all weaves together, and if the patterns in the fabric imply some meaning.

Don't think I'm gonna just be writing dark poetry on black paper with black ink in an unlit room, though!! As most of you who know me are well aware, I have a rather goofy and hopeful side, and it's often to the fore. I'll be writing about my musical endeavors, hijinks with my crazy and creative friends, family hoohah and hanging on the farm with the cats and the chickens. As well as whatever ridiculous observations about Life, Nature, Sex and Art spring into my somewhat twisted brain. And you're welcome to read or not, and respond if you feel like it. I'll try to shoot off some stupid thing or other every day if I can! Till next time, Peace and Love,

Todd

Cancellations

Today I was driving around, doing all the things that my crazy life requires I do...taking my Dad to the hospital for more tests, fixing my Mom's car, renting chairs for my upcoming wedding this weekend, and other stuff...and I get a call from the bar I'm supposed to be playing at tonight. They're cancelling me...because of a last-minute Tigers game that's gonna fill their bar with people who'll want to watch it on their giant TVs. So we're superfluous, and we're out. At the last minute too. Now I have to call my bandmates, who are as thrilled about this as you might imagine, and try to buoy their spirits up and share their pain at the same time. Some of us have cancelled other gigs to make this one, which now won't pay us for our lost time, and may decide to ax us altogether if we squawk too much about it. I grind my shiny shiny teeth.

The problem is that we have so very little leverage in the music world at this time. There's a million bands that would love to play every gig (granted, not as gifted as the band I'm fortunate enough to be in, but still), and the Musician's Union is as sad dusty shell that can essentially do nothing about situations like this. I know, I worked for the MU for a while, doing their paperwork. I wish it were otherwise. We're playing as much as any band in our area doing this Roots-oriented stuff, and I'm having a lot of fun doing it, but moments like this remind me that a lot of these clubs don't really give a crap about live music, or they're doing it on a whim, or under duress from one of the owners, or whatever. I won't say that they're bottom-feeder gigs....hey, I've BEEN on the bottom...but we're not too high up the food chain either. I've been to so many clubs without stages, or dressing rooms, or lights, or actual space to set up, that when I get said stuff I'm startled. And that's sad.

 It's a whole other blogs worth of words to talk about the changes in the public's perception of Music and their valuation of it...certainly there are other things people are doing with their time (like me right now). But is live music an endangered species? Yeah, I think it is. Am I gonna keep at trying to do it? Yeah, because I can't stop. Does it get me down sometimes? Yeah...hey, if you're gonna keep asking questions you might at least buy the next drink, buddy.

Top 10 Touring Tricks

Things to think about before you go out on the road…

1. Pack efficiently – a large (wheeled) duffle bag and a small book backpack should be enough for a tour under two months long…or even longer. Consider what kinds of weather you’ll be encountering, having a spare sweatshirt can be a lifesaver even in the summer if you’re close to the ocean or in the mountains. I’ll pack in walking shoes as well a gig boots, and a lot more t-shirts, socks and underwear than you think you need. Cotton clothes and drip-dry stuff is great since you may be doing your laundry in the sink at the hotel, especially if you’re in Europe! Laundromats are hard to find, and finding time to use them is harder. I’ll just ask for a couple more towels and wring my socks, t-shirts or whatever out with them…before a show…hang ‘em up and they should be dry by next day.

2. Bring food with you – even in the States it can be hard to find anything remotely edible on the highway stops…pack some Protein Bars and things like that along. Even if promoters tell you that they’ll provide a meal, surprises happen…a lot…and having a bag of granola or whatever can make a big difference. Note: DON’T pack perishable stuff! Those bananas are just gonna stink up the van, trust me. Eat that kind of thing as soon as you get it. And if you’re a band that brings its own cooler along, well, you’re smarter than the ones I’ve traveled with! It’s a great idea, you’ll save a lot of dough if you buy sandwich stuff at a grocery, and you’ll eat better and stay healthier. And don’t just fill it all up with beer!

3. Save those little soaps and shampoos you get in hotels. Nice and disposable. Who wants to travel with a big ol’ slimy bar of wet soap? Not me! Plus, shampoo bottles can open themselves…if you do travel with bottles like that (and toothpaste too), put them in Ziploc bags just in case. Keeps your kit bag from being slimed.

4. DON’T trash your hotel room/dressing room. That’s for babies.

5. If you don’t have your own sound guy, be sure to make friends with the one at the venue you’re at. Yeah, some are idiots and some are insane, but they can make or break your sound, and you have to deal with them. Be pals with them, buy ‘em a drink or whatever, ask ‘em about their job and what the crowds are like. A sound man’s job is difficult…they’re supposed to be transparent…and a lot of the time the only time they get acknowledged is when something is going wrong. If you’re on friendly terms you’re a LOT more likely to get what you want in terms of sound, and your special requests won’t make you seem like prima donnas. Plus, these guys usually talk with the owners of the clubs more than you do…if they like you, they’re liable to talk you up to them, and repeat business is the name of the game.

6. Bring stuff to keep you from going crazy. Back in the day I’d stuff all my available extra space (such as it was) with books and CDs. Nowadays, a well-stocked iPod and a Kindle can take their place, but it’s still an essential thing to have for some distraction. There’s lots of time a band on the road will want to talk together, but some of those long drives can dry that up occasionally. If you’re a game player, bring those. I’ve also spent a lot of road time writing, and if you’re a songwriter you might consider spending time each day with your notebook…it can be a valuable thing to do, and it eats up the miles as well.

7. Try to get a little time for yourself when you can! One of the hardest things about being on tour is that there’s very little privacy, and that can get on your nerves after a fairly short time. If you have some down time, maybe take a walk, check out the city you’re in, find a park or browse a pawnshop, whatever. You’ll get less burned out. And also, if you can, get out and have fun with your bandmates on days you have off! Getting a chance to get out, have new experiences, see new things and meet new people are some of the best things about touring. Don’t spend all your down time watching sports on hotel TV.

8. Do I really have to tell you to be great to your agents, to the club owners, promoters, fans and friends on the road? Everybody you meet will eventually talk about meeting you…give ‘em something good to say. I’ve sure heard bad stories about artists from all those kind of folks, and it does nothing good for their careers!

9. I won’t tell you what to consume (who’d listen anyway), but please, try to be aware of the fact that any intoxicants are gonna affect your performance, your stamina, and your health out on the road. I can speak from the experience of many years of dissipation! Many of us like to relax with a drink or whatever before or after a show, but just remember that the stresses and the ongoing party vibe of the music scene can make overindulgence seem like a good idea. Really, it’s not so good…the sides of the touring road are littered with the bodies of great musicians who fell too far off the wagon. And touring is physically stressful anyway…it’s just very easy to burn yourself out, and that’ll take a toll on the most important thing, the music. So have fun, but if you indulge, please pace yourself.

10. One of the best things about festivals and multi-band shows is getting to hang out with the other musicians! Lots of great times and experiences to be had for sure, and a lot to learn, both about music and survival on the road and in the business. Again, just being friendly has positive results most of the time. Networking with new friends can help your career too…you can get invaluable tips on new venues for booking, the word on promoters and agents, ideas for new shows…it really never hurts to make friends, and you never know where it can lead. When I worked with the Ultrasonics, our keyboardist Ben spent some time hanging out with the members of Blues Traveler while we were at a festival. After our band finally folded, they hired him! He’s been playing with them ever since. I always enjoy being able to spend time with our crazy, wonderful compatriots in this business, it’s always a treat, and part of what makes it a fantastic career at any level. May you too have a lifetime of great experiences as a musician! You’re already well on your way.

So things have been going really well for The Shelter Dogs in the last few months...we've put together a new CD that everybody seems to like, our musical catalog has expanded quite a lot, our playing has gotten tighter and more cohesive and fun, and we're gigging a bit and folks are showing up and enjoying it! I feel good about it. Although, as one of the principal guys in the band doing booking, I would love it if I had a manager who would do that part. Maybe someday. Things still seem to be progressing slowly to me...but that may just be my nature to see it that way. Actually, for the time we've been together, things are doing great.

This week I'm getting ready to start moving my old Magic Attic Studio into my farmhouse...it's gonna be a lot of work but it'll be a better space and I should get a lot more done. I'll have to scrape together a few more pieces (anybody wanna give me a nice beefy computer? Ours melted down), and get the rooms ready, but I'm looking forward to recording the band there, as well as doing some of the Beowulf Kingsley stuff and producing a few of my friend's bands as well.

Still wrasslin' with the Upright Bass! It's a monster...but a good one. Every time I think I'm starting to really get it down, I wind up looking at a Ray Brown video on YouTube and it's "Well, back to the practice room"!! Currently I'm looking at a new fingering method (for me, anyway) by this amazing cat named Francois Rabbath (check HIM playing on YouTube too!), a remarkable soloist and teacher. Thing is with the Upright (BEWARE! Boring tech talk follows): the darn thing is so huge that most practical fingerings have had to be divided up into whole-step and half-step positions, and there's a lot of shifting your hand around the bass. And the traditional method involves a LOT of positions...it's sort of debatable how many there are, but more than a dozen...it's very confusing and easy to get off your intonation (tuning). Rabbath divides the bass up into just 6 positions, and uses a fingering system that apparently helps your intonation stay spot on. So I'm gonna give it a shot! It involves learning a whole different approach, but I like learning new things, so we'll see. I might even start bringing the bow out to gigs. Earth people, tremble in fear!!!

Anyhow, I'm feeling strangely positive for being a 59-year-old looking towards February. It was a mess of a year last year, and there's been a lot of challenges, but I'm still afloat mostly, still living with the coolest girl in the world, still feeding all these dang cats, and still playing music. I'm feeling more creative and energetic these days, even if my back might be a little creaky in the mornings (well, sometimes in the afternoons too). We'll see what the future brings in!

The New CD...A Real One, Too!

Today I'm taking a little time to enjoy the new CD that I and the other Shelter Dogs have been working on for a while...and hey, it's sounding pretty dang good! It took a good long bit for Pete to mix it down (there were some issues in the original recording) and a bit more for me to do my impression of a Mastering Engineer, but I think for a first album it'll do quite well. I've got the artwork finished (I'm starting to actually understand Photoshop now) and we'll do a short production run here in my studio, just to have some physical product. I know it would be cheaper and less hassle to send it out, but I have all the facilities here and I might as well use what I've got...for now, anyway. I'll send the next run out to the shop.

It took some time to massage the tracks into shape (I think next time we'll use the facilities at my place...my studio computer was down when we did this), but really, we did all the recording in about 12 hours! Two nights, everything live, no overdubs except for vocals which we did all the second night. Very Chess or Sun Records style! After doing one of my very technical records for the Beowulf Kingsley thing, all by myself for three years at a time, that's really refreshing. And I've got to say, the playing is marvelous. I'm so lucky to have gotten together with Tom and Pete, they're both such amazing musicians and the chemistry between us is so good. Those tracks were a joy to lay down! I'm looking forward to where this project takes us in the future.

I'm starting to feel that the physical CD is becoming an anachronism, though...how many people buy them these days? Anybody? I know I often don't bother and just go for the download these days, mostly because all the local record stores are mostly gone (with the exception of the soulful Encore Records in A2, selling used stuff), and because most of what I'm looking for is...well...eccentric, I'd guess. At least eclectic. But not having a physical package bothers me. Not only because of the very real danger of losing all your music if your hard drive blows out without backup, but because for the most part there's no feeling of connection, it's all much more abstract. Yeah, it lives on my PC and on my iPod, but I can't pick it up, I can't see the art, and liner notes? They're gone, baby, gone. Although there's no reason why a digital package can't have all that (and more), most don't seem to bother. So future listeners won't have any idea of who played on what, or who wrote it, or what the original art on classic LPs looked like, or how the artists felt about it, unless they go diggin' online. And how many will? I'm thinking very few.

But at this point I'm still reveling in putting together a CD. I enjoy mixing and mastering, and designing covers and labels...and at the place we're in right now as a band that's just starting out, really, having something to give to a club owner or to sell off the stage is very useful! And I'm proud of this band, I'd like to have people be able to take a little of our music home with them, maybe turn on their friends to it. Share out some of this good time! And I'll figure out a download site later on.

The Joy Of Promo

I've been working recently on getting The Shelter Dogs, our lovely and talented band, out in front of crowds that can appreciate them...and I tell you, I don't think I was born for this side of the business! Most of my life as a musician I've been a sideman, which has its positives and negatives...the negatives include having little or no say on creative input or song selection, being at the mercy of the bandleader's (sometimes questionable) instincts, and having no control over when and where you'll play. The positives are that you don't have to do promo, or to deal with bar owners, festival promoters and booking agents...stuff I'm now learning to do. In some respects its a very good thing, and when everything works out it's great, but it's a lot of hassle too mostly and a LOT of time on the phone, on the web, and designing and producing the material you need.

There are a lot of useful tools these days that we didn't have till just recently...Facebook, Reverbnation, Twitter (still have to work on that one), Electronic Press Kits, and just getting around on the web makes things a lot easier. But each of the social networks, promo sites, etc. all have a learning curve to them...which takes more time...and also, seeing just how MANY bands and performers there are out there is kind of intimidating. Not that I'm really too worried...I actually think The Shelter Dogs are an amazing band that has a great future...but just getting people to see 'em is the challenge. And hopefully not just at some sports bar where the big screen TV behind the stage is broadcasting the game! I did a sub gig with my pals The Blues Owls last month where we were doing that very thing...crazy.

So I've got some challenges ahead, trying to make ends meet while doing all this promo stuff (hey, and I still have to work on my playing and to rehearse with the band!), while dealing with family, friends and my lovely fiance. Oh yeah, and the seven cats...maybe I should talk about them in a different post though. That's a WHOLE other subject. Anybody want a cat?